She is not actually a good person. A good person couldn't survive the shit that she has, couldn't do the shit she can do. She's perfectly capable of hurting someone if she thinks it might save their life.
Even someone she loves, and she loves him. She loves him, and she's so glad he kept running when he jumped and that he ran home. She's so glad he didn't put himself more at risk and jump back to get them, because what happens then is more people died.
it was a goddamn miracle AJ got her out of there alive himself, and she doesn't much believe in miracles so she's not betting on another. Sure as hell is not betting his life on it.
And she doesn't think she can go through- She breathes out again, stares at her hand. )
I'm not going to let you die because of me. And you will. You'll take chances because of me. Chances you don't have to take if I'm not around.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
[audio]
Date: 2019-05-07 11:11 pm (UTC)( can't be the reason he dies. she can't be.
She is not actually a good person. A good person couldn't survive the shit that she has, couldn't do the shit she can do. She's perfectly capable of hurting someone if she thinks it might save their life.
Even someone she loves, and she loves him. She loves him, and she's so glad he kept running when he jumped and that he ran home. She's so glad he didn't put himself more at risk and jump back to get them, because what happens then is more people died.
it was a goddamn miracle AJ got her out of there alive himself, and she doesn't much believe in miracles so she's not betting on another. Sure as hell is not betting his life on it.
And she doesn't think she can go through- She breathes out again, stares at her hand. )
I'm not going to let you die because of me. And you will. You'll take chances because of me. Chances you don't have to take if I'm not around.
So I won't be.